Drinking the hair of the dog that bit me

Okay.
So I'm not exactly drinking the hair of the dog that bit me BUT i am drinking the hair of the dog I bit after another dog bit me, and by bit me i meaned BURNED ME WITH HIS HANDS i mean, wazs this because I didn't buy you a drink dude? I mean, fucking Jay was triing to buy you one before h went off to enjoy the benefits of john. John being the fucking bathroom. I hate bloggin and I hate Jay, so fucking stupid but's my best firend and shit anyway so. well. drinking. Just got up and it's the afternoon or something, not doing too well on that fornt. or doing REALLY WELL on that front. Or I need another glass of whiskey. or something.

my arm really hurts. because of HIS HANDS UBRN PEOPLE YOU COULD GET LOCKED UP FOR THAT OR AT LEAST NOT GET VERY GOOD SERVICE IN PUBS OW. it really hurts and everytime I move it hurts more so getting more booze makes it hurt. maybe if i pour some whisky on itas';dfghjls'kl;nb< ?>zcfg



That did not work. nobody tell Jay about htis right? ze had a really read the blgo anyway so theres no point btu  I DON'T KNOW THIS STUFF I DON'T KNOW HOW THINGS WHERK FUCK WHERE'S THE BOOZE
this was alesx by the way.

DANCIN!

LIVING IT UP LIKE A BLOODY CHAMP! I got a date tomorrow, and I'm dancin! I am Dancin like a champ! God I love dancin! WHEEE!

In all seriousness, totally need to relax a bit. Had the bartender buy suity a drink! Although, he didn't notice suity, and was very confused when I kept demanding it!

Weird suity suity suit guy! Suity. I like saying that. Suity suity suity. Like when you're calling a pig. SOUUUUIIIIIIE!

There's only one proper response to this! Grab another beer. And then a bourbon. And then a scotch. And then get George Thoroughgood and the Destroyers to blast through the wall like the Kool-Aid man and perform their damn song.

Gonna go pray to the procelain goddess now. She requires and offering of puke and gropey uncomfortable barely conscious sex.

-J

goddammit Alex

Alex is all trying to be coherent what is zie trying to prove

whatever bitch/basterd/whatever. I can hold my own just watch me. Fucking sobering up by force of will righttttttt.....NOW.

That tall fucker is still here. Worst party crasher I swear. But he's more than that I think. Scares Alex bad. I dunno maybe because he only shows up when I'm drunk but I am not scared of him. Alex is fucking around idek what zie's doing. Zie's saying something about fields. Magnetic fields? Zie fucking lovves that band and with good reason but i dunno if that's what zie's talking about right now.
fuck I have the spins. HEY let's finish this sixpack. or get into awkward emotional confessions now becaus god dammit i am scared. of the guy yes. but because of other things too. but mostly the tall guy. Please don't look at me with that faceless face anymore I can't handle it
don't LOOK AT ME
GET AWAY fuck oh fuck get away from alex get away from hir please oh please just leave us alone if I keep on drinking will you leave us alone

oh hey another bottle yes

The Man Who Isn't There

Yeah so I'm Alex and I'd be probably as drunk as Jay right now but honestly the fact that we've been getting drunk to get rid of the faceless asshole because we heard it worked somewhere keeps scaring me sober. Not sober enough, since I keep typing wrong shit but okay, so he shows up at your normal state of consciousness so why not try to go to a different one to get rid of him, I mean what else can you do? So we have been drinking and smoking and it's been making Jay a little more oblivious to how fucking pants shittingly terrifying he is but damn he's there or he's not at the same time. So how the fuck is that right I mean god.


Jay is really fucking shit in the head and I am starting to think that these aren't our real names. I need more drink. I feel like the whole faceless guy thing might click into place in the place drunk and high go to play together. Something about fields. Jay is being a total dipshit about this, or maybe getting waaaaay too into it or something, like roleplaying gone horribly wrong.


but anyway need to do waaaaay more drinking before I' am comparitively understandabble okay I think the viodka just h kicked in a bit more but I rthink i'm supposed ot be writngins seomthing.

HI GUYS

IT'S BEEN FOREVER I DUNNO HOW TO TAKE OFF CAPSLOCK SO
YEAH

FUCKING MUMFORD AND SONS ULTIMATE DRUNK MUSIC

THERE WILL SOON BE A POST FROM MY GENDER NEUTRAL BRO ALEX WHO IS FUCKING BAWSSSSSSS
BUT YEAH SCHOOL IS OVER FOR THE YEAR SO FUCK THAT SHIT SUMMERTIME IS THE RIGHT TIME OR DO I MEAN THE NIGHT TIME IS THE RIGHT TIME OR WHATEVER
UH SO ANYWAY i guess oh shiiiiiiit capslock is off WAT DO?
ANYWAY me and my bro alex were talking hipster shit all night so like we win at life all fucking around on tumblr and skype MY GOD WE ARE ON THE ITNERNET SO MUCH.
uh so there's this skinny motherfucker who shows up all the time and he's a fucking buzzkill did I talk about him before? He's a dick
his face is all fucked? IDK
ANYWAY

FUCKING MOMFORD AND SUNS
OR HOWEVER YOU SPELL IT

Fucking swaying and shit oh man this fucking guy wheres is face ast this is silly man, just fucking silly.

moar beers? BEERS FOR FEERS YHS I MEAN YES
Whatever bros i ain't even mad that you dind't ask me out to the bar, having a good time with my internet friends and all and Alex bro what is with this facelsss fucker he is like bad newsssss
man should i stop posting naaaaah fuck that I'mma make a copy lol jokes no one gets but me whateverrrrrr

BACK TO TUMBLR FOR FUCKING TEXTS FROM GLEE LATER FUCKERSSSSSS